As the CEO of QUANADA, a group that offers support to victims of sexual and domestic abuse, and the parent of a kid enrolled in Quincy Public Schools, I am appalled by the actions of the physical education teachers at Denman.
Protecting children from danger is one of our most significant duties as parents, guardians, and community members. Regardless of the intention, actions such as those described in the DCFS report can have the effect of ignoring boundaries and leaving our children open to future sexual assault.
First, we need to teach kids to identify unacceptable behavior. Often, grooming begins quietly with a trusted adult giving gifts, secrets, or extra care that gradually crosses bounds. We empower kids by educating them to recognize these warning signs and distinguish between acceptable and inappropriate touch.
The next step is to train children to resist. This does not imply that they are in charge of stopping abuse, but kids should understand that they have the freedom to refuse, leave, or ask for assistance. Speaking up can be made more confident by rehearsing instances, particularly when an authority figure is involved.
Above all, children should be encouraged to report any behavior that causes them to feel uneasy or perplexed. Adults who react with conviction, encouragement, and action foster a culture in which abuse is less likely to continue unchecked.
The idea of everyday consent forms the basis of the recognize, resist, report method. The foundation for healthier relationships throughout life is laid when youngsters are taught that they are responsible for their own bodies, that they can refuse hugs, that their boundaries are important, and that consent needs to be reciprocated. Additionally, it aids them in identifying instances of boundary violations. Furthermore, we don’t have to limit these discussions to sex in order to make a difference. Asking someone’s permission before taking a drink from their glass, borrowing a hoodie, or sharing a photo of them on social media are examples of everyday consent.
Keeping children safe is a continuous process. It’s a continuous conversation based on empowerment, transparency, and trust. Children receive a clear message that their bodies belong to them and that their safety is our top priority when we discuss consent with them and provide them the skills they need to identify, oppose, and report abuse.
QUANADAQuincy, IL Chief Executive Officer Megan Duesterhaus, PhD
